"The Druggist"

My follow up appointment with the hematologist was today to go over the results of the thrombophelia panel of tests they ran at my consult. The good news is that the tests reveal that I have Factor V Leiden (DUH) and really nothing else of any significance. I do have a MTHFR mutation but not the version of it that causes miscarriages in pregnant woman, so that's good news.

The results of my timed blood draw last week were not good. My level was .88 and I need to be over 1.0. 

The doctor explained to me that it's not possible to know right off the bat how much more Lovenox I need to get me to that level, so it's going to be trail and error. I can either be bumped up to 165mg or 180mg. He opted to bump me up to 180mg.

Here's where it gets awesome! Not. 

I was already on the max dose of pre-filled syringes of Lovenox. Doctor explained that the manufacturer of Lovenox doesn't make pre-filled syringes of a higher dosage than 150 mg (thanks a lot assholes) and that I would need to mix my own syringes.He wrote me a script for needles and syringes.

He said that I have to be careful what pharmacy I take my script to because "the druggist" may unknowingly sell me syringes where the needles aren't removable. What the hell is a druggist? I know this doctor is old, but seriously... they are called P-H-A-R-M-A-S-I-S-T-S now.

Although he's still using the term druggist he's a lovely man who clearly knows his shit. I know he's a good doctor because I overheard him on the phone advocating for another patient. He was questioning the other doctor about if he was absolutely sure that their patient didn't have malignant lesions in her lungs, because one of her tests that he was copied on the results for was suspicious and he just wanted to be absolutely positive she was in the clear. Thankfully, it sounded like she was legitimately in the clear.

When I dropped the script off, the "druggist" was questioning the doctors order. According to her, it does carry risk of infection due to the fact we're fucking around with transferring meds into all these extra syringes and needles. She made the helpful suggestion of switching the order to a 30 day supply of 80mg and 100mg pre-filled syringes which does save me about $15 but then I'd have to stab myself TWICE every morning. No fuckin' thanks lady. Easy to suggest when it's not your stomach taking a beating at 7am. I'm sure she was looking out for my well being so I don't get an infection but I buy clearance meat (close to expiration date) every week at the grocery store and drink my milk a couple days past the expiration date, so I think I'll be okay.

The druggist sent me on my way and said she'd call the doctor to clarify. When I came back an hour later, she went over the instructions with me and said "the doctor insisted that you mix your own syringes" and you could tell it pained her to say that. I had to get a tutorial in the pharmacy on how to load all these bigger syringes and again there came that pesky math and my pits started sweating.

I left there with a giant sized plastic grocery bag packed to the gills full of meds, needles and syringes. I feel like such a dilapidated old woman with my grocery bag of shots that it's not even funny.

To keep things fun around here instead of dessert after dinner, we had a syringe filling party. Since I take my shot at 7am seven days a week I wanted to practice tonight so I don't fuck it up tomorrow when I'm waking up in a groggy haze. There is math involved in this process so it causes me some anxiety and I'd like to practice with a clear head.

Here's what my kitchen table looked like:

Wanna come over for some dessert? ;-)